I was seven months pregnant.

The dholaks and women singing rang in my ears. It felt too noisy, too annoying, and at one point I wanted to cry because the stool that I was seated on made my feet hurt.

I felt heavier than usual because of my lavish yet gorgeous bansari silk saree. From head to toe, I was adorned with jewellery. In fact, Bhairav Ji liked to tease me by saying I was wearing an entire jewellery shop.

My cheeks reddened as the women around me continued their giggling every time my husband passed by to receive the other male guests. I just wanted all of it to end, but the food was the best part.

The entire Chaudhary family had gathered for the celebration. I was honestly surprised to see the large number of guests that Maa and Dadi had invited. Keshav and Bhargav were somewhere outside, instructing the servants to receive the guests. I hadn't seen Bhairav Ji stand still for even a minute.

One of the older women placed her hand over my head, "Sadaa suhagan raho, bahu."

(May you have a prosperous married life, bahu.)

I smiled respectfully and bent down to touch her feet to the best of my ability. But right then, my breathing hitched because the devil inside me kicked. Even the child hadn't given me a moment's peace for the past few months.

My hand involuntarily moved to my stomach, begging the brat to calm down for a while, or I'd truly break down into tears.

"Didi, ab aapki saari shikayatein door hui na!" One of the women held the underside of my chin while glancing at Maa and laughing. Dadi and Maa looked overjoyed. They had showered me with so much affection in the past few months, especially while dressing me up this morning.

(Didi, now all your complaints have disappeared, right?)

Bhairav Ji had stifled a laugh every time he passed by us. The monster...

I was fed ghee laddoos and spoons of honey. It was the only thing that kept me sane. My feet were really hurting.

At that time, like a ray of sunshine, Saarang came bouncing towards me, "Didi! Didi! Yeh lo aapke liye!"

(Didi! Didi! Look! This is for you!)

Everyone watched in amusement as the boy held up a piece of half-eaten chocolate, "Keshav Bhaiya ne di hai mere liye... Par sabhi aapko mithayi khila rahe hai, mujhe bhi khilana hai! Didi muh kholiye, aaah!"

(Keshav Bhaiya gave it to me... But everyone is feeding you sweets. Even I want to. Didi, open your mouth, say aah!)

I chuckled at his innocence; everyone did. Saarang had been most excited for the arrival of his niece or nephew. I took a small bite of his chocolate since I knew he loved it so much, "Bas kaafi hai..." I patted his cheek.

(That's more than enough, thank you...)

"Didi ab bacha kab aayega?" He asked curiously. Maa and Dadi laughed at his question as he had been asking me that almost every day for the past month. In fact, my stomach had gotten so large that I could barely move from one place to another. It didn't make sense how much bigger it would get before I gave birth. But as long as it was for my little one, I was ready to put up with anything.

(Didi, when will the baby come?)

"Kuch mahine aur intezar karo," I mumbled, smiling at him weakly.

(Wait for a few more months.)

Saarang sighed, "Theek hai."

(Alright.)

Just as he was leaving, he accidentally stepped on my swollen feet, and I hissed in pain. Saarang panicked and began apologizing immediately. "Koi baath nahi..." I sighed, "Pehle se hi dard tha. Tum jao aur Keshav Bhaiya ke paas rehna."

(It's fine... It was hurting before as well. Go and stay near Keshav Bhaiya.)

"Theek hai," he nodded and ran away.

(Okay.)

But not even ten minutes later, Bhairav Ji appeared in the courtyard. The men usually stayed away, minding their business. I didn't know why he had come.

"Kuch chahiye tha, beta?" Maa asked, about to get up, but he protested, "Nahi... Aap baithiye Maa. Subah se isne khaas kuch nahi khaaya, isliye lene aaya hu. Dopahar ho gayi hai."

(Did you need something, son?)

(No... You don't have to get up, Maa. She hasn't eaten anything proper since morning, so I came to get her. It's already afternoon.)

My eyes widened just a little. The gesture made butterflies play cricket in my stomach. Did he love me that much? Really?

Some women shared knowing looks and smiles. The elders were even more surprised. Dadi was confused, "Woh humare saath baithkar yaha neeche kha legi-"

(She'll sit with us here and eat later-)

"Nahi," Bhairav Ji cut her short and didn't wait for any more protests before walking over to where I sat. "Uth jao, hath pakad lo," he said softly. My heart melted, and I could swear that my eyes welled up as I took his hand.

(No. Get up, hold my hand.)

"Sh-shukriya," I whispered, finally standing up fully. I had to hold on to his arm since my feet had gone numb from sitting for so long. "Mai naukaraniyon se bol dunga, mehmano ke liye khaana parosne ke liye. Hum alag kha lenge."

(Th-thank you.)

(I'll tell the servants to set lunch for the guests. We'll eat separately.)

"Par, Bhairav-!"

(But, Bhairav-!)

Before Maa could say anything, he led me away from them and into one of the quieter rooms with a table. He pulled a proper chair for me, and I sighed in relief as I sat down. Bhairav Ji asked a maid to serve me lunch there.

"Pair kaise hai?" He asked, caressing my thigh, "Saarang ne aakar bola Didi ke pair dard kar rahe hai."

(How are your legs? Saarang told me that his sister's legs were hurting.)

I gasped, "Aap isliye aaye?"

(Is that why you came?)

He nodded, the same emotionless face, and I clutched his kurta while on the verge of tears, "S-Saarang ne aapse aakar bola...? Aur aap sach mein mujhe bachane aa gaye?"

(Saarang told you about my pain... And you really came to save me?)

Bhairav Ji pulled my hand away, "Chup chap khaana kha loh, mujhe aur bhi bahut kaam hai."

(Just eat your food quietly. I have a lot of other things to do.)

My smile faded the next instant. He was still heartless, still cold. Nothing would change about him. A maid served lunch for me before turning to my husband, "Malik aapke liye-?"

(Sir, for you-?)

"Abhi nahi chahiye," he dismissed her with the wave of his hand, and I just watched him as he propped his arms on the table, staring at me, "Jaldi kha lo, meri gilehri."

(I'm not hungry now.)

(Eat quickly, my little squirrel.)

I frowned, "Aap khaye bina mai kaise kha sakti hu?"

(How can I eat unless you've eaten?)

"Khaane ko bola hai tumhe, Sanjana." He snapped suddenly, making me flinch. Why did he have to act kind one moment and yell at me the other?

(I'm asking you to eat, Sanjana!)

I looked away and quietly made a morsel of rice. His eyes didn't leave me, and I lifted the morsel to my mouth, eyeing him. But before I could eat it, I pushed it into his mouth.

Bhairav Ji looked amused as I giggled, "Ab mai khaana kha sakti hu, Thakur Ji." I wiped his lips with my thumb while he quietly watched me, eating slowly as he didn't have a choice. I fed him a lot more times while eating, and he willingly opened his mouth for me, which made me smile.

(Now I can finally eat, Thakur Ji.)

"Humare bacho ko bhi aise hi khilaungi," I blushed, smiling to myself as I could imagine a little stubborn version of Bhairav Ji sitting beside me as I fed him.

(I'll feed our baby in the same way.)

My husband choked when those words left me. I grew panicked as I poured him a glass of water; he drank it in one go, panting, "Yeh humara pehla aur aakhri bacha hai. Mai sirf theen bacho ka dekhbaal kar sakta hu."

(This is going to be our first and last child. I can only look after three kids.)

I frowned, "Aakhri bacha matlab? Mujhe ladka aur ladki chahiye... Aur theen bache kaun hai?"

(What do you mean? I want a girl and a boy... And who are the three kids?)

"Saarang aur yeh..." He said, pointing to my stomach, "Aur meri teesri aulaad to bilkul naak mein dum kar deti hai. Din bhar ek pal ki bhi chain nahin lene deti. Chhoti chhoti baaton par din raat roti rehti hai... aur phir bhi tum chahti ho ki main ek aur bachche ka baap banoon?"

(Saarang and this one... And my third kid is a pain in the ass. She doesn't give me a moment's peace. Keeps crying day and night for the littlest of things... And still you want me to father another baby?)

I was about to leave when he smiled and squeezed my shoulder, preventing me from getting up, "Naraaz kyu ho rahi ho, meri gilehri?"

(Why are you getting mad, my little squirrel?)

"Aapko agar itni shikayatein hai toh mujhse shaadi kyu ki?" I glared at him.

(If you have so many complaints, then why did you have to marry me?)

"Tumse shaadi karke maine kisi aur badnaseeb aadmi ki jaan bacha li hai," he smiled.

(I saved some other unlucky soul's life by marrying you.)

"Maine bhi bacha li hai!" I snapped, "Aap agar kisi dusre aurat se shaadi kar lete, to woh aapko agle din chhod kar bhaag jaati!"

(Even I've saved a soul! If you had married some other woman, she would have left you the very next day!)

"Acha?" He raised an eyebrow, feigning surprise. Before I could snap back again, he flicked my lips, causing me to jolt back.

(Really?)

"Zyada bakbak mat karo. Khaana thand ho jayega."

(Don't run your mouth too much. Eat the food before it goes cold.)

I turned away in disgust while swallowing each morsel of rice. My heart was racing so much with unmistakable affection, but at the same time, I wished to murder him.

***

I was finally rid of all my ornaments. And when Bhairav Ji came into the room, he crossed his arms, staring at all the gold that I had laid out on his table.

"Thakurain Ji, dukaan hai kya?"

(Thakurain Ji, is this your jewellery shop?)

I didn't say anything. My head was already aching from the long day. My feet were swollen and painful, and I couldn't even ask one of the maids to massage them, as everyone had been busy the whole day.

"Aapki Mama ki beti mujhse achi sari pehen rahi thi, pata hai?" I said, removing my last earring.

(Your uncle's daughter was wearing a better sari than I.)

He began undressing behind me, "Toh kya hua? Bas mai jaanta hu ki bina sari ke meri biwi badi achi lagti hai." My face reddened as I glared at him in the mirror.

(So what? Only I know that my wife looks pretty good even without a sari.)

"Jab maine pucha toh boli ki unke pati ne khareedkar di hai..." I whispered, "Aap mere liye kyu nahi khareedte ache sari?"

(When I asked her, she told me that her husband bought it for her... Why don't you buy me nice saris like that?)

Bhairav Ji took a deep breath and opened the cupboard, "Toh yeh sab naukar ko de deta hu, kyu?"

(Then I'll donate all these to the servants.)

My eyes widened, and I clutched his hand, "Nahi!"

(No!)

"Nahi?" He cupped my chin.

(No?)

I shook my head, "M-mai- Bhool gayi thi... Unke baare mei... Woh bhi ache hai..." I mumbled. He let go of me, climbed into bed, lying down peacefully. But I still had to get rid of my sari and change into a cotton one.

(I... I forgot about them... They're also nice...)

Bhairav Ji watched me from the bed as I struggled to remove it. He moved towards me and quietly helped with the pleats until I was left in my underskirt and choli. It felt embarrassing to stand before him like that. My large, uncomfortable belly, the countless stretchmarks along my waist, and my large, sagging breasts.

"Yeb bhi utar lo..." He told me quietly, "Phirse sari pehenne ki kya zaroorat hai?"

(Remove this as well... Why do you want to wear a sari again?)

I froze as he undid the thread of my underskirt. It fell to the floor, leaving me in only my underwear. Bhairav Ji got up and began unhooking my choli while there were tears in my eyes, "Mai hil nahi sakti aur aapko ab bhi meri faida uthana hai?"

(I can't even move, and you're still thinking of sex?)

He didn't say anything. The same cold stare and stoic face. I gave in, defeated as he removed my choli. Bhairav Ji's hands came up to hold my breasts. He squeezed them for a while, making me close my eyes and lean back on his chest. But I didn't expect him to pull away.

I was surprised when he pulled out one of his cotton kurta tops and made me wear it.

"Tumhare pair dekhne hai, let jao," he instructed, and I was a bit apprehensive while getting into bed. Bhairav Ji sat beside my feet. My anklets had gotten quite tight, and he began removing them while I jerked forward, trying to stop him from touching my feet.

(I need to see your feet. Lie down.)

"Aap mat kijiye- Ah!"

(Please don't do it- Ah!)

The baby kicked. I leaned back against the headboard, panting, and Bhairav Ji smiled to himself, "Bacha ab se samajhdar hai."

(The child is smart.)

There was nothing I could do to stop my husband from removing my anklets. There were tears in my eyes, "A-aap... Par aap... Aapne di hai... Mat utariye..."

(But... Please... You shouldn't remove it... You bought them for me... Don't.)

"Shh..." He put them in the drawer, "Naya khareedkar dunga-"

(Shh... I'll buy you new ones-)

I leaned forward and hugged him. My arms wrapped around his neck as I buried my face in his chest. Bhairav Ji ran a hand down my back.

"Aap itne ache kyu hai? Aap kitne pyare hai... Aapke jitna mujhse koi pyar nahi karta, Ji. Mai kabhi aapko chodkar nahi jaane wali. Hamesha aapke saath rahunga."

(Why are you so nice? You're so sweet... Nobody loves me as much as you do. I'm never going to leave you. I'll stay with you always.)

He caressed my hair as he stared down at my tear-streaked face, "Pati hu... Thoda toh zimmedari banta hai." I felt butterflies inside me as he kissed my nose.

(I'm your husband... This is the least I can do.)

"Ab let jao... Pair mai daba deta hu-"

(Now lie down. I'll massage your feet-)

"Nahi!" I gasped, "Aap mat kijiye aisa. Naukaraniyon se kal karva lungi... Aap... Aap mat chuiye pair... Vinti karti hu, Thakur Ji."

(No! Please don't do it. I'll ask the maids instead... You shouldn't touch my feet... Please, Thakur Ji.)

He hummed, and I watched him take my sari. "Zara haath aage karna," he instructed. I was confused, but did as told. He tied the sari around my wrists, and only when he got up from the bed did I understand what he was about to do.

(Bring your hands forward.)

"Bhairav Ji, mat kijiye!" I pleaded as he pulled my wrists and tied them to the headboard. I couldn't move my hands at all or struggle as I watched him go to the table to fetch the oil that the maids usually applied to my swollen feet.

(Bhairav Ji, please don't do it!)

I cried even more, asking him to stop, and finally, my husband pinched the inside of my feet, glaring at me, "Sanjana... Agar ek aur baar shor machaogi toh raat bhar aise bandh dalunga."

(Sanjana... If you keep crying like this, I'll keep you tied the whole night.)

I went silent and sniffed as he applied oil to his hands and pressed my swollen feet carefully. A part of me wanted to moan because it felt awfully good, but I restrained myself. I didn't want to annoy him further.

Even then, I felt awfully happy in my heart that my husband was doing such things for me.

A/N - Do let me know in the comments what you think of the story so far :)