I startled awake in bed when the bedroom door unlocked. Bhairav Ji came in and noticed how I wiped my tears in a hurry. There was a plate of food in his hand. He gently shut the door behind him before keeping the plate on the bedside table, "Kha lo, garam hai."

(Eat it, it's warm.)

"Mujhe nahi khaana," I frowned at him, "Bache kaha hain? Aapne mujhe unse door kyu kiya?"

(I don't want to eat it. Where are the kids? Why have you taken them away from me?)

He sighed, "Der ho rahi hai, Sanjana. Tumhe bhook nahi lag rahi?"

(It's getting late, Sanjana. Aren't you hungry?)

I squeezed his arm, "Agar aap bacho ko mere paas nahi laate, toh mai kabhi khaana nahi khaungi." He stared at me for a while. I was resolute this time. Nobody could separate my kids from me.

(If you don't bring the children to me, then I'll never eat again.)

"Laata hu," he mumbled and got up from the bed. It was surprising that he had given in to my request so easily.

(I'll bring them.)

A while later, Bhairav Ji returned. He was carrying the twins carefully in each arm. My heart leaped with joy as I took them into my embrace. Their little bodies felt so warm, so precious. I wanted to keep them safe in my arms forever.

My son slowly began crying. His little hands clung to my pallu. It seemed like he was begging to be fed. "Aapka nanha Thakur toh har samay bhuka hai..." I slowly undid the choli of my blouse.

(Your little Thakur is always hungry...)

Bhairav Ji sat behind me. His hands snaked around my waist, and he nuzzled against my neck, "Kya kar rahe ho, Ji...?" I mumbled and turned my head away as it felt ticklish.

(What are you doing, Ji...?)

"Do hafton ke andar bachchon ka naamkaran sanskaar hoga."

(The children's naming ceremony will be in two weeks.)

I glanced at him over my shoulder, "Tab mai kamre ke bahar aa sakti hu?"

(Then can I come out of the room?)

He kissed my head, "Aa sakti ho, meri gilehri. Mai Dadi se baat karunga. Par sach kahu toh... Tumhara kamre mei rehna hi sahi hai."

(You can come outside, my little squirrel. I'll talk with Dadi. But if I'm being honest... I'd rather you stay in the room.)

His words felt like a sharp blow to my gut. Did he think that way as well? Was that why he hadn't done anything to stop Dadi from locking me up in our bedroom?

"Aap toh Maa aur Dadi ke khilaaf nahi jayenge," I mumbled, returning my attention to the children.

(You won't go against Maa and Dadi.)

Bhairav Ji gripped my chin, he forced me to look at him, "Pehle meri baat suno. Bina sune kuch mat bolo."

(Listen to me first. Don't go spewing things without listening.)

"Mujhe nahi sunna aapki baat... A-aap... Aap hamesha... Aisa hi rahenge-"

(I don't want to listen... You- You'll always be like this...)

"Chup!"

(Shut up!)

He snapped.

I watched in fear as Bhairav Ji got up from the bed, "Pichle nau mahino se tumhe sone ki tarah sambhal raha hu. Abhi toh sirf do din hi hue hain tumhe janam diye. Tumhara shareer abhi bahut kamzor hai. Jitni jaldi tum is kamre se bahar niklogi, utni hi jaldi Maa aur Daadi tum par ghar ka kaam daal denge. Main nahin chahta ke tum par abhi koi bojh aaye... samajhti kyu nahi? Jab tak mai na kahu tum is kamre se bahar nahi nikal sakti."

(I'm looking after you like gold for the past nine months. It's been just two days since you gave birth. Your body is still weak. The sooner you leave this room, the sooner you'll be piled with work again. I don't want any responsibility to be on your shoulders right now... Why can't you understand? Until I see fit, you're not going to leave this room.)

He took a cigarette out of his pocket, "Samajhti kaise? Aurat toh har baat mein meri dosh nikaalti rehti hai."

(How will you even understand? Woman is always eager to find faults in everything that I do.)

"Ji, aisa nahi hai-"

(Ji, it's not like that-)

He ignored me and went to the balcony before I could say anything. Bhairav Ji wasn't usually upset like this... Was I really at fault this time? How was I meant to decipher his mind?

A small hand reached for a lock of my hair. "Ah, beta chod do..." It took a while to free myself from my son's firm grasp. I sighed. It felt like he was begging me for attention.

(Ah, beta let go...)

"Aapki dekhbaal karna hai... Aur Baba ko bhi manana hai... Maa sabka khayaal kaise rakhegi?"

(I need to take care of you... And make amends with your father... How will I handle it all alone?)

He yawned just a little before latching his mouth to my breast and suckling away again. I smiled. Children really had not a care in the world.

Meanwhile, my daughter began crying. She was lying beside me as she scrunched her face and screamed at the top of her lungs. Her chest puffed as she wriggled her hands and legs, and I was almost fearful seeing how red her body turned. I kept her brother down on the bed and took her into my arms.

"Shh... Ro mat beta... Kyu ro rahi ho?" I rocked her gently, but she didn't budge. Finally, she quietened when I fed her.

(Shh... Don't cry beta... Why are you crying?)

But the other troublemaker began crying then. I tried rubbing his chest with one hand while holding my daughter.

The moment I paid attention to one of them, the other felt left out.

"Ab toh har raat aise hi beet jaayegi..."

(From now on, all nights are going to be like this...)

I glanced up to find Bhairav Ji leaning against the doorframe, watching us with a cigarette in his mouth. I didn't say anything. The children were more important. As I tried consoling my son, Bhairav Ji sat on the edge of the bed and lifted our baby into his arms.

"Chup ho jao mere nanhe shaitan," He sighed and caressed our little boy's back. I watched in awe as he lay his head on his father's shoulder. Even his sobs softened as Bhairav Ji kept patting and rubbing his back.

(Be quiet, my little devil.)

I smiled and inched a little closer to him. He watched me with those cold eyes as I took the cigarette out of his lips and left it on the ashtray.

"Bacho ke samne toh mat kijiye, Thakur Saheb..."

(At least don't smoke in front of the kids, Thakur Saheb...)

He didn't say anything. Only watched me. I even leaned forward and pecked his lips. Bhairav Ji closed his eyes just briefly, and I knew that the kiss had made him a tiny bit softer.

"Bache jab bahar the, Maa, Dadi aur do naukraniyaan bachchon ki dekhbhaal mein lage the... aur tum sochti ho ki yahan andar sab kuch akeli sambhaal logi?" He raised a brow.

(While the children were outside, Maa, Dadi, and two maids were taking care of the kids... And you think you can handle them alone?)

"Mere bache hai," I frowned, "Mai kar sakti hu unki dekhbaal ache se."

(They're my kids... I can take care of them well.)

"Acha?" He asked in faked amusement, "Aur inke dekhbaal karte karte... Tumhara dekhbaal kaun karega?"

(Oh really? And who'll take care of you during all this?)

I smiled, gently caressing my daughter's head and rocking her in my arms, "Aap hai na, Thakur saheb?"

(You're there for me right, Thakur saheb?)

He scoffed and stood up from the bed when our son began crying again. Bhairav Ji paced across the room, patting his back and humming Hindi songs that he had memorised from the radio.

Once I was done feeding my daughter, I gently laid her on the bed beside me, and Bhairav Ji placed the other one beside her as well. He lay down near them and propped himself on his elbow before caressing their chest. Even I felt charmed by the way he hummed sweet tunes. I yawned with the children.

"Kisko sula raha hu, pata nahi..." He rolled his eyes. I giggled and moved to his side of the bed before wrapping my arms around him from behind. Bhairav Ji squeezed my hand and whispered, since he didn't want to wake the kids.

(I don't know who I'm putting to sleep...)

"Chod do, Sanjana. Main aaj yahan nahi so raha. Tum bacho ke saath so jao... Unse saari shikayate batao, main jaata hoon. Tumhe khushi milegi."

(Let me go, Sanjana. I'm not sleeping here tonight. You stay with the kids... Complain to them to your heart's content; I'm leaving. It will make you happier.)

"Aap phir kaha jaoge sone?" I mumbled and tightened my grip around him, "Aap mere bina kaise so sakte ho? Akele sone mei dar lagega aapko."

(Where else will you sleep? How will you sleep alone? You'll feel scared if you sleep alone.)

He was about to leave the bed, but I held him tighter, "Nahi-!"

(No-!)

"Shh!" He hissed and pressed his palm over my mouth when one of the kids stirred in their sleep. Bhairav Ji sighed and lay back down on the bed, facing me.

I clutched the back of his shirt and pressed my face to his chest, inhaling his scent. It felt so nice to be so close to him. Bhairav Ji slowly wrapped his arms around me as well. He knew he couldn't fight it anymore. I could feel his warm breath against my ear as he leaned down.

"Aapne har baat par naraaz hone ke liye mujhse shaadi ki hai?" I mumbled.

(Did you marry me to get mad at every little thing?)

He pulled back just a little and stared into my eyes. They were much softer now as he noticed how I was pouting.

"Nahi," he whispered back and kissed my forehead, "Pyaar karne ke liye shaadi kiya hai. Par agar har chhoti baat par mujhe dosh deti rahogi toh nahi kar paunga... Har baat par sabr karna mere bas ki baat nahi hai. Main bhi insaan hoon, koi bhagwaan nahi."

(No. I married you to love you. But if you keep criticising me for every little thing, then I won't be able to do that... I'm not a very patient man. I'm human as well, not a saint.)

I hummed and nuzzled against his neck, "Theek hai... aap mujhse ek vaada kijiye. Kuch bhi ho jaaye, aap kabhi mujhse alag mat soyiye. Aap daant lijiye, chilla lijiye, mujh par gussa kar lijiye... lekin aise mat kahiye jaise aapko meri zara si bhi parwah nahi, jaise mujhse door rehna aasaan ho."

(Okay, promise me something... No matter what happens, never sleep apart from me. You can scold me, shout at me, be angry with me... but don't say things like that, as if you don't care about me at all, as if staying away from me is easy.)

The edge of his lips lifted up just a little in a soft smile, "Aasan toh bilkul nahi hai, meri gilehri. Mujhe akele sone mei dar jo lagta hai?"

(Of course, it's not easy, my little squirrel. After all, I get scared of sleeping alone, right?)

I was smiling, yet flustered as I buried my face in his chest. Bhairav Ji held me close.

A/N - Vote and comment if you like the chapter!