Who was I kidding?

I was worried that Bhairav Ji would ruin his health. It would affect not just me, but the kids as well. I couldn't just let him sleep on an empty stomach.

The glass of badam milk that I prepared for him was warm. I tasted it a bit to make sure it wasn't too sweet. The rest of the haveli had already gone to sleep, so I could approach my husband again.

Bhairav Ji was at his table, reviewing a few papers while listening to music on the radio. He looked up at me with a frown, then resumed his work immediately.

I hesitated as I softly placed the glass on his table. He glanced at it once but didn't say anything.

"Aapki pasand ki hai..." I mumbled.

(It's your favorite...)

He didn't reply. I sighed and went up to the terrace to get the children's dry clothes. By the time I returned to the bedroom, the glass was half empty.

So, he was hungry...

I wondered how much more stubborn he was going to be. But it brought a smile on my face to see that he had at least ingested something.

Bhairav Ji cleared his throat as I busied myself with folding the clothes. "Woh dusra lighter kaha rakha hai?" He asked without glancing at me.

(Where have you kept the other lighter?)

"Mez ke andar dekhiya na, wahi hoga," I replied just as nonchalantly. Bhairav Ji opened the drawer to look for it. At least he was communicating now.

(It must be in the drawer; check there.)

"Sanjana?"

His tone was suddenly icy, and my hands froze. What had I done now?

The drawer was wide open when I turned to look at him. My heart skipped a beat. Did he realise that my wedding jewelry was missing from there?

"Tumhare gehne kaha gaye?"

(Where is your jewellery?)

Bhairav Ji's eyes were cold as he glared at me. I gulped. Of course, he'd notice it. He noticed everything. I was so stupid to think that he wouldn't...

"W-woh... Woh maine... Almari mei rakh di..." My voice trembled.

(I- I thought... I thought of keeping it in the almirah.)

"Dikhao phir."

(Show it to me then.)

I slowly moved towards the cupboard and pretended to search for it. My hands were shaking. Would he get even more violent if he found the truth?

"Y-yahi... Rakhi thi..." I whispered. There were tears in my eyes already. Never had I felt under so much pressure.

(I- I had kept it... Right here...)

There was a loud crash, and I hissed in pain when a glass shard struck my cheek.  Bhairav Ji had thrown the glass of almond milk at the wall beside me.

"Samajhti kya ho mujhe?!" He barked.

(What do you think of me?!)

"Itna sab karne ke baad bhi jhoot bolti hai?!"

(You dare lie to me after all of this?!)

"Sab kuch us saale ko de diya!"

(You gave everything to that bastard!)

"Mujhse bataya bina aise karne ki himmat kaisi hui tumhe!"

(How dare you do that without telling me!)

"Uski itni madad karne ki icha thi toh saath kyu nahi chale jaate! Uske saath tujhe bhi nikal dena chahiye tha! Kaash ki bawli aurat se shaadi hi nahi ki hoti!"

(If you wished to help him so much, then why didn't you go with him? I should have kicked you out with him! Wish I hadn't married a madwoman!)

He stormed outside the room and shut the door with a bang.

Hot tears rolled down my face as I stared at the mess he had caused. There was milk all over the floor, and even on my sari. There were glass shards everywhere, and I could barely see them.

My stomach was hurting. Did he even remember that I was pregnant?

Did he even care?

As bile rose to my throat, I was in a hurry to reach the bathroom. My head was spinning as I thought about everything he said. In my hazy state, I stepped on a few glass shards. God, it hurt so much. So much.

I struggled to walk as I clung to the basin and threw up. The child was just as cruel as its father. My knees gave in, and I sat on the bathroom floor panting. Now there was blood on the tiles as well, because of my bleeding feet.

I'd never forgive him for this. Never.

All those confessions of love had been just an illusion.

He was and would always remain a monster.

The tears didn't stop as I plucked the glass shards from my feet. I felt so miserable.

There was a sharp pain in my stomach once more. My baby... It was probably in pain too. And if I continued being miserable... I could even lose the child.

No, please no. I'd do anything to prevent that. At least for the child, I'd pretend to be happy. Even if my husband treated me like an enemy, I knew that I had done the right thing. Keshav and Payal deserved happiness.

Just as I felt myself lose consciousness, the bedroom door opened again. Two maids stood there, their eyes wide in disbelief.

"Thakurain Ji!-"

"Dhyan se..." I mumbled with the little strength left in me, "Neeche kanch padi hui hai..."

(Be careful... There's glass on the floor...)

They carefully made their way to the bathroom before helping me stand. I was taken to the bed to rest while the maids cleaned the mess. They helped me bathe and dress as well.

"Aap theek hai, Malkin?" One of the girls whispered, seeing how I was drifting in and out of consciousness.

(Are you alright, Malkin?)

"Daima ko bulau? Aapki tabiyat achi nahi lag rahi..."

(Should I call the midwife? You don't look that good...)

I shifted a little, "Woh kahan hai?"

(Where did he go?)

"Thakur Ji?" The girl asked in surprise, and I nodded. They told me that they had seen him last fetching whiskey from the kitchen.

My stomach ache felt awful, and I closed my eyes. One of them cleared their throat as I hugged my waist, "Aap... Phirse pet so ho, Malkin?"

(Are you... Pregnant again, Malkin?)

"Kya farak padta hai?" I muttered, turning away. She apologized immediately, and both of them wiped the underside of my feet with antiseptic before applying medicine. It really hurt a lot, and I wondered how I'd be able to walk in the morning.

(What does it matter?)