I glanced outside the kitchen window when I heard the kids laughing. The twins and Saarang were playing together. Maa had gone to the temple with Bhargav and my devrani was nowhere to be found either.

"Aradhya kaha hai?" I asked a maid beside me.

(Where's Aradhya?)

"Choti Bahu toh kamre mein bachche ko dudh de rahi hai," she replied. I had already put Arnav to sleep in his crib as well.

(Choti Bahu is in her room feeding the baby.)

I peeked out of the kitchen door. My husband was in his armchair, a book and pen in his hand as he listened to old songs and scribbled down their lyrics. He sure loved his music.

"Raat ke khaane ka intezam karo, mai abhi aayi," I told the maid.

(Prepare dinner. I'll be back in a minute.)

"Ji Malkin," she nodded.

(Yes ma'am.)

Two other maids were busy washing clothes, and two others were drying red chillies on the terrace. I smiled to myself. Finally, I could catch Bhairav Ji alone in the daytime.

My husband glanced up when he heard the jingling of my anklets towards him. Bhairav Ji raised a brow as I held his shoulder and sat on his lap with my legs crossed.

He glanced at his watch as I wrapped my arms around his neck. "Thakur Ji..." I smiled sweetly at him. "Maa mandir gayi hai?" He mumbled, then gave me an unamused look, "Kya chahiye is baar?"

(Did Maa go to the temple? What do you want now?)

"Aap har baar aise kyu sochte ho!" I pouted and laid my head on his shoulder. Bhairav Ji sighed, "Sanjana utho. Mujhe aur bhi bahut kaam hai..."

(Why do you always assume I want something from you!)

(Sanjana, get up, I have other work to do.)

"Kis tarah ka kam?" I asked innocently and undid the first few buttons of his shirt before slipping my hand inside. Bhairav Ji stared at me quietly as I caressed his chest hair.

(What kind of work?)

"Koi mehengi cheez hogi is baar..." The man muttered.

(It must be something expensive this time...)

I looked at him from under my lashes, "Aap nahi dilwaenge?"

(You won't get it for me?)

"Mai jaanta tha!" He pretended to bite my ear, and I giggled, pushing his face away. "Bahut chhoti cheez hai. Sirf itna sa," I pinched my fingers together.

(I knew it!)

(It's a very small thing. Only this much.)

"Kya cheez hai jaan? kaho toh sahi," he sighed, brushing my hair and kissing my temple.

(At least tell me what it is, my dear.)

I took the pen out of his hand and wrote "hairpin" in English.

Bhairav Ji looked confused, "Yeh toh bahut saare mez pe padi hai na?"

(Don't you already have these?)

"Uff!" I huffed, "Aisi maamooli pin nahi chahiye. Badi aur rang birangi wali chahiye, sheher se. Dila dijiye na." I held his cheek, fondling him gently.

(Uff! I don't want an ordinary pin like that. I want a bigger and colorful one, from the city. Please get it for me.)

"Yeh farmaaish kaha se aa gayi?" He muttered, not falling for my affection.

(Where did this yearning come from?)

I drew patterns on his chest, not meeting his eyes. "Pados ke ladkiya keh rahi thi... Sheher ke baazar mei ek nayi baalon ki pin ayi hai. Sirf ek baazar mei milti hai woh. Sabali mei Meenakumari naam ki dukan hai... Bahut bade aur rang birangi pin milte hai."

(The girls in the neighborhood were saying... In the city baazars, they're selling a new kind of hairpin. It can only be found in one store. It's called Meenakumari in Sabali... They sell such beautiful hairpins.)

He was quiet for a while, "Jaanti ho Sabali kitna door hai?"

(Do you realise how far Sabali is?)

"Par mere pati ke liye toh koi bhi cheez na mumkin nahi hai!" I grinned.

(Nothing is impossible for my dear husband!)

Bhairav Ji squeezed my face, "Zyada makhan mat lagao. Kaisa dikhta hai tumhara yeh pin?"

(Don't try to butter me up. What does this hair pin look like?)

I giggled and began drawing it carefully in his notebook. One of my friends had shown me a newspaper cutting of an actress wearing it. It was truly beautiful, especially because of the little gemstones and it's gold plated outer body.

"Yeh kya bana rahi ho?" Bhairav Ji interrupted.

(What are you drawing?)

"Shhh."

"Dekhne mei toh do bandar ek dusre se pyaar kar rahe hai-" he chuckled to himself.

(It looks like two monkeys loving each other-)

"Aapki aankhein jaanch kar lijiye," I sighed.

(Get your eyes checked.)

"Nahi, mai dikhata hu," he tried taking the pen from me. I didn't let him, but he eventually snatched it out of my hands and began drawing over my picture.

(No, let me show you.)

"Yeh hai bandar ka kaan... Aur yeh pooch..." He was grinning, "Aur dekho ladka bandar ladki ke upar hai. Dono maze kar rahe hai-"

(This is the monkey's ear... And the tail... And look, the boy monkey is over the girl now. Both of them are fooling around-)

"Chup rahiye!" I was flustered as I snatched the pen out of his hands and struck out the drawing furiously. My husband laughed, "Sharma kyu rahi ho? Apne aap ko dekh liya kya?"

(Oh be quiet!)

I glared at the pervert I had married. I took the book out of his hands and turned to a new page. This time I drew the hairpin a lot more carefully. Bhairav Ji kissed my ear, watching my drawing carefully.

"Ab haathiyo ke beech ke sambandh bana rahi ho kya?"

(Now are you drawing two elephant making love?)

Even though I was furious, I couldn't help but snicker at his comment, "Aapke dimaag mei sirf yehi ek soch hai?"

(Is that all you think about?)

Bhairav Ji looked at me like I was the culprit, "Aise aadmi ke god mei aakr baithogi toh aur kya sochunga? Ashleel tasveere mai nahi, tum bana rahi ho."

(If you squirm like this on a sane man's lap, what else am I supposed to think? I'm not the one drawing dirty pictures, its you.)

"Mai ashleel tasveere nahi bana rahi!" I protested, "Aapki soch ashleel hai."

(I'm not drawing dirty pictures! It's your mind that is dirty.)

"Sirf meri soch?" He leaned into my neck, pressing a soft kiss there. "Mere karm bhi kaafi ashleel hai, Thakurain."

(Just my mind? Even my actions can be quite dirty, Thakurain.)

"Mazaak chodiye... Aur baat par dhyaan dijiye," I chuckled and tried to push him away, but Bhairav Ji didn't budge. His arm was curved around my waist, and his other hand held the side of my face, pressing kisses to my neck and hair.

(Stop joking already... And let me draw.)

"Kamre mei jaakar aur ashleel tasveere banate hai, chalo," he rasped in my ear. I squeezed his shoulder, "Avi so raha hai."

(Let's go to our room and make more dirty pictures, come on.)

(Avi is sleeping.)

"Use kamre se bahar phek denge," he replied casually, continuing to kiss and fondle me.

(We'll throw him out of our room.)

At that time I heard the kids shout for their Dadi outside. My eyes grew wide in panic as I fought my husband's arms to free myself.

"Chodiye, Maa wapas aayi hai!" I hissed, pushing and clawing his arms.

(Let me go, Maa's back home!)

"Unhe bhi toh batau ki unki masoom si bahu kitni ashleel tasveere banati hai pati keliye... Kyu?" Bhairav Ji smirked.

(Let her see for herself the kind of indecent pictures her supposedly innocent daughter-in-law has been making for me.)

"M-mazaak mat kijiye! Mujhe jaane dijiye!" My face was entirely red.

(S-stop joking! Let me go!)

My husband shook his head, thoroughly enjoying torturing me like this. I fought with all my might now, but Bhairav Ji had his heavy arm wrapped around my waist.

"Maa bhi toh jaane ki unke peet peeche tumne aise pati ke god mei aakar baithne ki himmat ki hai... Sirf mujhe hi kyun daant sunni padti hai hamesha?"

(Maa should know too that, behind her back, you had the nerve to come and sit in your husband's lap... Why am I always the one who gets scolded?)

Had he lost his mind?

I could hear Maa remove her footwear at the door as she talked something with Bhargav and the children. My heart was beating erratically. She'd lose her mind if she were to see us in this position.

With all my might, I pulled out of my husband's arms. But the brute had already let me go.

Maa appeared at the front door with Bhargav right behind her. Even Aradhya came out of the bedroom with Rekha in her arms. Their eyes were wide as I crashed miserably on the carpet, crying out in pain.

"Sanjana!" Maa shouted as she rushed towards me. Even Aradhya did the same, and she handed Rekha to Bhargav while helping me up.

"Kya ho gaya tumhe? Kaise gir gayi!" Maa stood beside me, her eyes wide in fear.

(What happened to you? How did you fall!)

The first person I looked at was my husband, who didn't even move from his chair. He held back his laugh while watching me. Such a cruel brute.

"K-kaleen se pau ulajh gaya..." I mumbled, rubbing my knee and elbows. They were hurting so much.

(I- I tripped on the carpet...)

"Tum aise baithe kyu ho?" Maa turned furiously to Bhairav Ji, "Bechari ko aise hi girne diya?"  There were tears in my eyes as she held my face lovingly.

(Why are you just sitting like this? You let her fall just like that?)

"Mai kya karta?" He smiled, "Yeh apne aas-paas par dhyaan hi nahi deti."

(What could I have done? She's always so clumsy.)

"Jhoot..." I muttered under my breath.

(Liar...)

Bhairav Ji leaned forward and squeezed my face in his hand. He inspected my forehead, and then my elbows. "Chot toh nahi hai," he smiled, "Ab zyaada naatak mat karo aur jaakar kaam dekho."

(You're not hurt anywhere. Now stop being so dramatic and go do your chores.)

I swatted his arm away and stood up, startling everyone else. He was still smirking at me in that cocky way. How I wished to push him off the damn chair!

"Aap bhi jaiye, Maa... Use kuch nahi hua hai," Bhairav Ji assured Ma again as I stormed off to the kitchen. Aradhya followed me quietly.

(You can relax too, Maa... She's completely alright.)

"Sanjana...?" She called softly. "Kya tumhe ulti aa rahi hai? Kya tum pet se ho-"

(Sanjana...? Do you feel nauseous? Could you be pregna-)

"Aradhya!" I snapped, losing my patience.  She flinched, covering her mouth immediately, "M-mai toh sirf puch rahi thi..."

(I- I was only asking...)

"Mat pucho! Mai phirse kabhi us rakshas ke bachhe ko janam nahi denewali..." I muttered under my breath. This time Aradhya tried to cover my mouth, her eyes wide, "Pati ke baare mei aisa nahi kehte. Koi sun lega!"

(Don't ask! I'm never giving birth to that monster's children again...)

(You shouldn't talk like that about your husband. Someone might hear you!)

I pushed her hand away, already annoyed. The man I married was nothing less than a monster.

A few days later...

It was late at night and I was taking out the clothes from Bhairav Ji's suitcase. He had returned from the city only in the evening and was now lying in bed, with Arnav in his arms. He was humming our baby to sleep.

A brown paper bag was in one of his pant pockets.

"Yeh kya hai?" I asked in confusion. Bhairav Ji glanced at it once, "Ah... Dena bhool gaya tha. Khol ke dekho."

(What's this?)

(Ah... I forgot to give it to you. Open it.)

My heart was racing as I looked inside. "Aapne sach mei khareed liya mere liye!" I gasped, my eyes twinkling in happiness as I hopped to my feet. Bhairav Ji only smiled. It was exactly the pattern I wanted- a hairpin that looked like a ribbon with gems studded on it. I rushed to the dressing table and immediately undid my hair.

(You really bought it for me!)

"Pasand aayi?" He asked from the bed.

(Do you like it?)

I twirled around and played with my hair after pinning it. Gosh, it looked exquisite, and I was so happy that I could die!

Bhairav Ji chuckled softly as I rushed towards him for a hug. "Bahut, bahut, pyaari hai... Shukriya," I whispered, burying my face in his neck as he wrapped one of his arms around me.

(It's so very adorable... Thank you.)

I climbed on top of him, a wide grin on my face because I was so excited. Arnav was sleeping on his chest without a care in the world as my husband watched me. I turned a little, showing off my new hairpin. Bhairav Ji crossed his arms under his head and watched me quietly.

"Kaisi lag rahi hoon?" I patted his stomach.

(How do I look?)

"Khubsurat," he took a deep breath, not looking away from me.

(Beautiful.)

His reply made me blush, and I laid my head beside Arnav, hugging both him and my husband tightly. Even though my husband was insufferable sometimes, he still made me feel like the luckiest girl in the world.